My dad is a smart guy. Throughout my life, he’s been right a lot. But most of the time, he wasn’t trying to be right. He was trying to teach me something. One piece of advice my dad gave me was foundational. And I guess I thought all parents passed down this truism to their kids. But today, I am reminded that they don’t. (See Anthony Weiner’s (D-NY) revelation today that he did in fact tweet that photo.)

Here’s what my dad told me: Lying makes it worse.

One Sunday morning when I was 8, I realized I couldn’t finish the plate of pancakes I’d helped myself to. For some reason, I felt the worst thing I could do was throw away those pancakes. My dad sat in the next room, as I claimed I was done and cleverly stashed the remnants in the garbage disposal. The true genius of my plan was that I didn’t turn on the disposal. Hence, he’d never know.

Um, wrong.

I could’ve admitted to throwing away breakfast, apologized and maybe agreed that I shouldn’t have been so greedy at the table — and honestly, that would’ve ended it. But instead, I lied.

And guess what? SO MUCH WORSE.

I’m pretty sure that it would take a couple more times of losing my friend time or phone privileges before I learned that no matter what I had done, lying would only make it worse. Oh, and also: The truth always comes out eventually. I learned these things before the transparency of social media and the evolution of “gotcha” journalism. (Not that I’m perfect, mind you, but the lesson has stuck.)

So, to members of Congress and other politicians, c-level execs, professionals running a marketing or PR department, and anyone in the public eye, I implore you: Enough with the lying. The public relations nightmares that follow an ill-advised decision will be bad. You bet. But my dad, who, as it turns out, is right about a lot of things, has been proven right time and again about this: Lying will only make it worse.

First things first: Does your company really need a style guide? Yes. The bottom line is that style guides help put everyone in marketing and — here’s the thing — in other departments on the same page. Consistency makes for more polished communications pieces.

I know it might sound daunting, but it doesn’t have to be. A style guide doesn’t have to be a 200-page book. It might be no more than a few pages. Here are a few simple steps to get you started:

1. Choose a baseline. There’s no reason to start from scratch when there are good, industry-standard guides available. Most companies opt for AP style as the baseline.

2. Highlight any dislikes. Whether you’re looking at AP, Chicago Manual, the New York Times or another style guide, it’s not going to be perfect. Your guide should call attention to any deviations from the baseline. Maybe you’re tired of “Web site” or really like a serial comma. Make these notes the first entries in your guide.

3. Add industry-specific terms. Depending on your industry, you may have jargon, technical terms and organizations that won’t appear in any generic style guide. Review industry journals or your latest communiques to help remind you. For example, if you work in tech security, you might use words like cybercrime, cybercriminal and cyberthreat — should these be one word or two?

4. Add company-specific terms. Now, it’s time to turn your attention inward. How should departments and divisions be referenced? Can your company name be shortened on second reference? Does your CEO use his or her middle initial in text?

5. Make it an evolving document. Don’t waste time printing and binding beautiful copies for your staff — unless you have extra budget burning a hole in your pocket. This document will likely change constantly. You’ll realize new entries you want to add with each piece you produce. You’ll see a change coming that AP moves more slowly on. Never consider this document final.

Congratulations! You just created a company style guide. Now, don’t forget to share it beyond the marketing staff, and make sure it’s being used — because without enforcement, you might as well not even have one.

Lately, a number of writers I know are finding reason to either bash PR pros — or call out a positive experience with one as a rarity. This is highly disappointing, especially given the number of former reporters who venture into PR. I value my relationships with PR practitioners for a number of reasons. When I’m on deadline, I can count on them to call me back and help me out, and when I’m fishing around for sources, I rely on PR pros to introduce me to businesses, individuals and trends that I may not be aware of.

Still, despite all the good PR folks out there, there remains a negative image. Perhaps, the economy is to blame — clients are demanding more results, more coverage, more return for their investment in PR, and reps are doing whatever they can to deliver. Regardless of what’s at the heart, here are a few simple things PR pros can do to help better manage relationships with the writers they work with.

1. Answer questions. Your client hired you to develop messaging and pitch a story. When a reporter asks a question that doesn’t appear on the fact sheet or release you prepared, that doesn’t mean you should ignore the question. Finding the answer is a good way to keep the writer happy.

2. Be prepared to work. If you pitched the interview or story idea, know that a reporter may be intrigued — but not willing to commit immediately. If a writer asks for more information, be ready to give it. Giving another sales pitch isn’t the answer. Your pitch worked — the writer just wants to explore a little deeper, which is his job.

3. Be gracious. If the writer says no, don’t launch into all the reasons why she’s making a terrible mistake. Acknowledge that it’s her call and offer to be a resource for future stories.

4. Offer your assistance. I recently reached out to a PR rep for a particular story. In our conversation, I mentioned that this subject was proving difficult to find examples for. Within minutes, she offered up two other sources and provided backgrounders “just in case” I needed help. And I did. She then offered to arrange the phone interviews for me. She made my job easier, and as a result, got more than her original client covered.

5. Ask questions. It’s easy to get in the habit of just trying to find someone who likes your pitch. I get that. But expert PR pros also know that asking questions might help yield a higher-quality media list. I am happy to answer questions like, “Is this a topic you cover all the time? Would it be helpful to receive updates about XYZ company?” It might be easy to identify a newspaper reporter’s beat, but asking questions of freelancers can help you develop a great — and mutually beneficial — relationship.

Today, I’d love to have a conversation with you about the way you view copy. Even without such a conversation, I ask you to consider a question you may or may not have considered before.

As copywriters, we’re taught that words matter. Then, we tell our clients, our bosses and our friends that words matter. Sure, we each have a style, and some of us break more rules than others. But on the aggregate, we’re sticklers for the ways words are used.

However, with more mediums to transmit your content and inherently more content to create, we’ve started to relax our rules a bit. We’re generally OK that you misspell or abbreviate for the sake of Twitter’s 140 characters. And we even — GASP! — do it ourselves from time to time. (Though we claim to have winced when we did it.) And Facebook is an informal medium, so who’s gonna get too judgmental there? Heck, blogs are intended to be casual conversations — who has time to craft and re-craft a blog, right? So, I’ll say for the record that yes, you might catch an error here.

But at what point do we really care? A daily one-page calendar from a resort on its events and activities? A company’s Web site? A short press announcement? What about a brochure? As a reader and writer, I don’t classify myself as a technical stickler, but I do pay attention. And I do notice when an organization’s content is full of typographical or grammatical errors.

Here’s the question I cited earlier: Do you? And at what point does sloppy copy affect your trust in or opinion of that organization?

One person whose job I don’t want today: Gov. Mark Sanford’s press secretary. I’m sure that job has more than its fair share of hard, stressful and just plain bad days, but on a day when your client/boss destroys his political and personal reputation in one press conference, that’s gotta be a tough day. Let’s face it: There are few things uglier than an extramarital affair — except a public extramarital affair.

Lies and deception are hard to walk back — no matter how good a PR strategist and speech writer you are. And when the offense is so grave as to betray a marriage vow, many of us can’t help but wonder if there’s any promise this guy might honor. If he’s willing to cheat on his wife, what lie won’t he tell? How do you convince people you’re worth trusting in office … even if your wife can’t at home?

But perhaps worse than his affair was the way he got caught. Really, Gov. Sanford? Disappearing to Argentina for five days? Having your staff say you were hiking? Really? How long can that last? I know you’re not the president. I know you’re no Jon or Kate. But you’re a public official. Reporters watch you. People know you.

Now, there’s the aftermath. It appears there’s something of a tidal shift. Rather than thinking him a dishonorable, fallen future presidential candidate, pundits, politicians and the public alike are starting to think he’s not so bad. He was honest and straightforward. He took accountability — and he’ll take his lumps. There’s even sympathy for the public way in which he has to take his lumps.

It’s hard for me to personally sympathize for anyone other than his wife and children, but I can appreciate those whose opinions of him changed just by observing his sincerity and honesty (albeit, a bit too late for me).

So, I turn it to you … Honesty may always be the best policy. Was Sanford’s too late? Will this just be a blip in his political career? Does anyone even CARE about politicians and their extramarital affairs? After all, we seem to expect them to lie and deceive — so, are we maybe even relieved when their lies aren’t about their jobs? Comment, discuss, pontificate.

Whether it’s the success of trashy daytime talk shows where “real” (I have to have my doubts) people expose their every thought or the expanse of news programming where we are privy to the words of so many talking heads, there’s something in the American psyche these days that demands we speak. Talking — a lot — is the only form of true communication, we seem to think. Politicos, marketers, journalists, joe citizens — we all want to get our messages out there. Hence, the rise of blogs and social media.

But this week, I am reminded that sometimes, it can be beneficial to just shut up. Check out this Mark Morford column about Judy Blume’s fundraising letter for Planned Parenthood:

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/g/a/2009/05/13/notes051309.DTL&nl=fix

Set aside your views of abortion for the moment. The thing to note here is that Planned Parenthood was able to generate free media, good PR — AND raise money for its cause. Why? Because the opposition just had to open its mouth and say something. Of course, they could’ve been more productive in their method, but regardless, many of us might not have ever heard this story if they had just zipped it just this once.

Another example just this week? Roger Clemens. For me, his ESPN interview only served as a reminder that he’s guilty. I can’t help but wonder if he would’ve been better off keeping his mouth shut and just letting the story die? Now, the story — and the polls that show that 90 percent think he’s lying — get more play. If Clemens’ story is one you just can’t get enough of, you might enjoy this column by the San Diego Union-Tribune’s Tim Sullivan:

http://www3.signonsandiego.com/stories/2009/may/13/1s13sullivan223348-clemens-crippled-denials-still-/

And if you’re like most of us and feel the need to communicate with words, leave a comment.